Oops, I meant to say “birth”:
Federal transport minister John Baird, Harpo’s right-hand man, and…
…Squealer, Napoleon’s right-hand pig?
News of the Restless A door at the end of a dead-end street…
Separated at girth?
November 30, 2008 — Sabina BeckerFederal transport minister John Baird, Harpo’s right-hand man, and……Squealer, Napoleon’s right-hand pig?
Colombia, the subversive narco-protectorate
November 30, 2008 — Sabina BeckerIf there’s any doubt still in your mind as to whether the Venezuelan opposition are really traitors, or that Colombia’s diplomats are really imperialist cats’-paws trying to foment an illegal separatist movement, you can now put your doubts to rest. Alberto Nolia, host of the VTV show “The Devil’s Papers”, has uncovered some definitive proof that the answer to both questions is a resounding YES:
Here’s the story, translated by your humble and obedient one:Venezuelan chancellor Nicolás Maduro Moros said he had conversed with his Colombian counterpart, Jaime Bermúdez Merizalde, who confirmed to him that he would “retire the Colombian consul in Maracaibo”, Carlos Galvis Fajardo, “which I thanked him for. He acted with extraordinary speed. I hope that this will not be repeated with any other diplomatic functionary from any other country”, and that there would be respect for international norms.The measure took place after the VTV program, “The Devil’s Papers”, revealed a conversation between Galvis and an advisor to Colombian president Alvaro Uribe, José Obdulio Gaviria, in which he expressed his happiness at the victory of opposition candidates in the gubernatorial elections of the states of Zulia and Táchira, the “marvellous” part being that it was “our work there”, and that they would soon meet with the governors “to take actions at government level.”Maduro said that this recording “confirms information we have been receiving that certain opposition members in the border regions were trying to get involved in a foreign plot against the unity of our nation.”President Chávez has been denouncing for months the separatist intentions of the border states, including Táchira and Zulia, to create a separatist “Media Luna” with the aid of oligarchs from neighboring Colombia. [...]The conversation between Maduro and Bermúdez took place before a speech by President Chávez, who indicated, without referring to the call, that if the Colombian consul had not been voluntarily removed, he would have to be expelled from Venezuela.[...]Addressing chancellor Maduro, Chávez asked, “Nicolás, have you spoken with the Colombian chancellor already? Because the only way that I will not expel this consul-general is if the Colombian government withdraws him quickly, now! If not, I’ll expel him. Either they remove him now, or I’ll throw him out of the country. I’ll expel him! I hope the government of Colombia makes the decisions it has to make.”So now the treacherous Colombian consul is gone, withdrawn by his own government. Problem solved? Don’t bank on it just yet. At best, this is only a stopgap. Until Colombia is no longer the loyal servant of you-know-where, and someone other than Alvaro Uribe (or anyone else equally crooked) is president of Colombia, we can expect to go right on hearing of incidents like this in Venezuela. Don’t forget that the Colombian consul was talking to no less a personage than Uribe’s own advisor (who, so far as I know, has suffered no consequences). Uribe is involved right up to his beady little eyeballs in this plot. He’s going to replace a few people and go right on pulling the self-same shit, all over again, and again and again, until it succeeds or he blows an artery trying.That is assuming, of course, that the people of the border states that went to opposition governors last Sunday don’t take matters into their own hands and get rid of those vendepatrias. Unfortunately, if they follow strict constitutional procedures, they’re going to have to wait awhile. But if there’s not a recall vote a couple of years from now in every single one of those states, and every one of those governors isn’t subsequently ousted by popular will, I’ll be seriously surprised–and disgusted.In the meantime, there’s always the criminal justice system, which is also as speedy as molasses at the South Pole. But who knows, maybe the federales will surprise us by taking a few newly-minted governors into custody yet. Stranger things have happened in Venezuela…
It’s that time of the week again
November 29, 2008 — Sabina BeckerYep, it’s that time when I get PMS–Pissed at Morons’ Shit.
You know you want it. I know I need it. So, with no further ado, here’s my list of all the people who really need to fuck the hell off this week:1. The 200-some-odd fucking morons who stomped a Wal-Mart worker to death today. I don’t know what the urgency was–full bladders and a need to use the WallyLoo, maybe? Whatever it was, it couldn’t have been the goods; WallyWorld is full of crap. No, I don’t shop there, partly on principle and mainly onaccounta I hate the atmosphere. Big boxes give me the willies. Especially when things like this happen. 2. Stephen Fucking Harper. For playing politics like a cheap fucking fiddle. First he threatens to pull federal funding to the parties (his own being the only one that can survive currently without it, go figure), then, when the Liberals, NDP and Bloc threaten a nonconfidence vote and a coalition government on that basis, Harpo sez “j/k, haha–friends?” Frankly, I hope they find their ‘nads and shit-can him. Hell, I’ll even put up with another annoying election call if it gets him off our backs for good. Two minority parliaments in a row, and he still thinks he gets to play Napoleon with a bad French accent? Va baiser ma fesse, Harpo!3. The fucking Venezuelan opposition parties. For acting just as dictatorial and immature and tantrum-y as Harpo, and considering that their poll numbers are about as bad as his, maybe that explains everything. But still, is it any excuse for threatening to burn a community centre, sending biker gangs to beat up poor folks in a PSUV-supporting neighborhood of an oppo-controlled state, and murdering three Chavista union leaders? Do they seriously suppose that violence and intimidation will do for them what democracy won’t? Have they forgotten so soon that these same people that they love to stomp on, are far more numerous than they, and they have long memories? Apparently, yes. For that, they deserve to get fucked–legally and constitutionally, of course. When’s the middle of the gubernatorial term again? That’s when they can get hit with a recall vote.4. The fuckheaded fucking fucks who shot up Mumbai. Don’t know who they are, don’t know what they want, don’t care a shit. What I do care about is that innocent people died and a beautiful landmark hotel got torched for no good reason. And that fucking burns me.5. The fucker known only as “the British Josef Fritzl”. This creep goes his Austrian counterpart several “better” (or worse, rather) by impregnating not one but two of his own daughters–19 times in all. Not only is he a pervert, he profited off it by stealing the welfare money that the daughters got to help them care for their deformed children. And you want to know what’s most sickening about him? The things he says in his own defence. Castration’s too good for him, and so’s hanging. Hmmm, what do you suppose that leaves?6. Glenn Fucking Beck. How the heck does a hatemonger who has “violence fantasies” about Michael Moore…end up writing a sticky, gooey Christmas book? No shit, I saw it in the drugstore today; put me in a very un-holiday mood to see his ugly, hemorrhoidal mug on the inside back cover flap (yes, I checked to make sure it was really him). If this is supposed to be some kind of image makeover, it’s an epic fail. Bound for the remainder bin in 5…4…3…2…7. Lori Fucking Drew. The bitch who harassed a sensitive, depressed teen to death on MySpace is getting off mighty lightly, considering what she did. Isn’t she old enough to know better? I’m younger than she is, and having been bullied myself, I definitely do!8. Anyone who still has the gall to say “Support the Troops” after hearing what the US has done to Afghanistan. I don’t care how much “care” they take to avoid “collateral damage”–it still fucking happens, and what’s more, the reason behind it is not clear, nor is it just. Why don’t they question the validity of their mission? I do all the time.9. David Fucking Frost. Do I believe he should have been acquitted? Hell no. His crass conduct throughout his sexual exploitation trial is an indicator of his true character. Plus, there’s the whole creepy Mike Danton thing. Why would Danton try to kill this thug unless there was something seriously perverted about him? There have even been recorded phone conversations indicating seriously hinky doings in their relationship. Frost needs to fuck off in the worst way!10. Lou Fucking Dobbs. Admit it, asshole, you’re a racist. And once you’re done that–FUCK OFF!11. Anyone who objects to my choices of persons who should fuck off–or, as usual, my saying so.
Festive Left Friday Blogging: Shiny happy leaders shaking hands
November 28, 2008 — Sabina Becker
But who am I kidding? I just like to post pictures with cute guys in the middle.
Someone in Ecuador is thinking what I’m thinking…
November 27, 2008 — Sabina BeckerAnd he’s even more Ecuadorable than usual:
Don’t you love it when great minds think alike? From Aporrea:The president of Ecuador, Rafael Correa, congratulated his Venezuelan counterpart, Hugo Chávez, for the electoral victory on the 23rd, in which the PSUV won 17 of 22 governorships and 265 mayoralties in Venezuela. “Thank you, Hugo, for the invitation to the ALBA summit, for the usual hospitality which we received; you know how much we love the people of Venezuela and support them in the struggle for a new Venezuela. I congratulate you for the victory on Sunday.”Correa also questioned the attitudes of the international media in their efforts to minimize the PSUV victory in the regional elections. “I don’t know whether to laugh or cry at the ridiculousness of the media, who want to minimize or disguise such a complete victory. The headlines in Ecuador go more or less like this: ‘Opposition gains ground, Chávez retreats’,” said Correa, who was unable to help guffawing.“Yes, this might make us laugh now, but the level of ridiculousness in the media is dangerous because now they are a major power. The power of information is very great in Latin America and we know what function it serves: a small group of big-business interests. This should bring us to political conclusions and decisions we need to make to promote public media like TeleSur, which inform and don’t distort,” said Correa.Translation mine. Linkage added.I think Rafecito must have been reading this blog, because I said the exact same thing just the other day. Either that, or there’s some weird Jungian synchronicity going on here. BTW, speaking of weird Jungian synchronicities, look who else is saying things the big ugly whore media don’t want you to hear about Venezuela:
A group of more than 130 international election observers praised the organization, fairness, and efficiency of last Sunday’s regional and local elections in Venezuela, and also gave constructive suggestions for how to reduce lines at polling booths in the future.The National Electoral Council of Venezuela (CNE) “has achieved credibility, efficient and transparent processes, and as a consequence of this, Venezuela has new legitimate authorities,” said Joaquin Vives, an observer from Colombia’s CNE, during a press conference Monday evening.The well-audited electoral machinery makes the Venezuelan electoral process “a pioneer in the world, leading the way down the correct path,” said the Colombian delegate.Vives also expressed admiration for the electoral spirit of the Venezuelan people. “Many things dazzled us about the process that the Venezuelan people lived [Sunday], especially its attitude. We observed voters who were willing, decided, patient, and in their great majority respectful and with great desire to construct democracy in Venezuela,” he said.[...]An observer from the United States, Anthony Gonzalez, pointed out that the voting centers were well equipped and well secured by the National Guard, and that by having election day on the weekend, Venezuela facilitated working class suffrage.Gonzalez expressed concern about long lines at voting stations, but expressed confidence that the CNE “has the capacity to respond effectively” by opening more voting stations in the future. He also suggested keeping more voting machines on reserve at each center.Costa Rican activist María Elena Salazar Alvarado said she observed the Venezuelan electoral process to be “beautiful, participative, of which all Latin Americans should feel proud.” Salazar added that she plans to share her experience with social movements in her country.Salazar was “filled with emotion” upon observing the participation of indigenous communities in the elections of the eastern Anzoategui state, where “women and men walked with enthusiasm from far away zones. They participated happily and expressed their satisfaction because now they are indeed taken into account,” she said.An observer from the US, praising “working-class suffrage” in Venezuela? Whoa nelly, that’s commie talk! What next? Will the Russians be coming?Too late; they’re already here. And, more unnerving, Chavecito’s not the only one welcoming them; El Ecuadorable and Lula are both all hail-fellow-well-met with Dimitri Medvedev. (What? Brazil isn’t scared of the Russian navy? Nope. Clicky da linky, ye unbelievers.)After all this, I think El Ec might just want to rethink his original decision not to join the ALBA. It’s clearly the coolest party on the block.
Outrage, please. We need outrage NOW!
November 27, 2008 — Sabina Becker
Russian President Dimitry Medvedev agreed Monday to send technicians to train Peru’s military to repair Russian-made helicopters.Medvedev and Peru President Alan Garcia announced the program after a weekend summit of Pacific Rim leaders in Peru’s capital.The technicians will work in military hangars in Lima and could lend their services to nearby countries that have Russian choppers, according to Peruvian Defense Minister Antero Flores-Araoz.A large part of Peru’s helicopter fleet was purchased from Russia in the 1970s by Peru’s military government. Peru previously sent helicopters to Russia for maintenance.The defense minister said the two sides still have to work out the cost, financing and launch date for the program.It digresses a bit with a predictable mention (screech! SCREECH!!!) of Chavecito and the Russian navy, before segue-ing (or non-sequitur-ing) into this odd passage:
Flores-Araoz said Peru is not and has never considered hosting a U.S. military base on its territory. The U.S. lease on the Manta air base in Ecuador, its only base in South America, expires in 2009.Now why would he say that? Strange. (Perhaps Colombia would also like to enlighten us, since its dinky little president was also at the APEC summit, cadging “free” trade treaties with Canada–uninvited.)Yo, whore media? Could we have some outrage here, please? A little monkey-screeching and feces-flinging and tossing of the T-word and the D-word would be in order, yes? Especially since Alan García is a lot closer to actually being a tyrant and/or dictator on his best day than Chavecito is on his worst. Don’t you think?(Muchas gracias to BoRev for the linky.)
Horton hears a foo’
November 27, 2008 — Sabina BeckerNo shit…Lou Engle thinks Dr. Seuss wrote scripture:
What the hell is that movement he’s making? Is he davening, or is he humping the lectern in a frenzy of thwarted homoerotic lust?Yeah, right, Dr. Seuss wrote that just so a wingnut like Engle could misinterpret a CHILDREN’S STORY. In terms of racism, sexism, and all the other evil ‘isms out there.What the hell kind of God would inspire Dr. Seuss to do that, anyway?An open letter to Bruce Sterling
November 26, 2008 — Sabina BeckerDear Sir:
You said that a certain item from the Foreign Policy blog was “infinitely delvable”, and I heartily concur–though perhaps not from the angle you would like me to. I presume you wanted to know how a certain soap opera in the Venezuelan mayoral elections of Sunday last would end. Well, Sir, I have an answer, courtesy of Aporrea.org. I hereby translate:The ex-first lady of the Republic, Marisabel Rodríguez, saw her chance to be mayor of Barquisimeto evaporate upon obtaining a lamentable 2% of Sunday’s votes.According to results released by the National Electoral Council’s website, in the municipality of Iribarren, which contains the capital of the state of Lara, Marisabel Rodríguez obtained third place in the regional election, receiving 6,696 votes, or only 1.97% of total electors.The mayoralty went to Amalia Saéz of the United Socialist Party of Venezuela (PSUV), who received 187,741 votes. Second place went to Alfredo Ramos, who represented diverse parties and organizations of the opposition with 139,816 votes. Meanwhile, Marisabel Rodríguez, as representative of Podemos, COPEI and UNT, took third place. The remaining five candidates came in with less than 1%. Iribarren municipality has a total of 618,863 voters.Well, Sir, there you have it. Not only did she lose, she lost big-time. Who knew that campaigns based on false accusations won’t impress voters who aren’t stupid?Unfortunately, since you didn’t allow commenting on your blog, I decided to comment on your “infinite delvability” here. Looks to me, Sir, like you have an infinite amount of delving to do. Best to start your delving by learning Spanish, and from there, progress to reading alternative and independent Latin American websites. You may also want to read books by Richard Gott, Gregory Wilpert and Steve Ellner, all of whom provide useful backgrounders into the general political situation of Venezuela. That way, you can see how it’s a foregone conclusion that an ex-first lady, who threw in her lot with the most discredited of the old parties, could lose so badly.Of course, that all entails a rather deeper understanding of Venezuelan politics than your average US-American is likely to get, especially from right-wing sites like Foreign Policy. But you did say it was “infinitely delvable”, and I did say I concurred.Please carry on writing science fiction, it’s your true métier. But you may not want to say too much about Venezuela from now on, lest you get pwned.Best regards,Sabina C. Becker.
RIP Kenny MacLean
November 25, 2008 — Sabina Becker
“Somebody Somewhere”, the hit written by Kenny MacLean for Platinum Blonde, a Toronto band, in the mid-1980s. Kenny, the band’s bass player from their second album onward, was found dead today of a probable heart attack. He was 52.
Venezuelan elections: Let the spinning begin
November 25, 2008 — Sabina Becker
Mr. Ledezma is the principal candidate of the Venezuelan opposition to President Chávez’s PSUV party for the office of “alcalde mayor,” the mayor of the greater Caracas area. He was once governor of the federal district, which was basically the same position as that of “alcalde mayor” today.What is forgotten by some people is that in 1993, when he was the governor, he prohibited all demonstrations in Caracas. However, since the election of President Chávez he has repeatedly called for people to go out into the streets and march in protest against the government.I would like to see the streets leading into Antonio Ledezma Corner filled with statues of Mr. Ledezma with signs in his hands indicating all the dates he has marched down the streets of Caracas in the last nine years. If there would be one statue for each moment, I doubt there would be room on the sidewalks for pedestrians. Therefore, each sign would have to have multiple dates. It is incredible that a person, who prohibited demonstrations when he had power to do so, has so frequently called upon others to join him in what he forbade.Heh. Kiddies, Auntie Bina is putting on her psychic swami turban and predicting that Grandpa Munster will probably soon have his hands full of fractious Chavistas from the hillsides, marching against him. And midway through his term, the microsecond he becomes legally eligible, he’ll face a recall vote–bank on it. He better get cracking on that garbage-collection thing, and if he’s smart, he’ll watch where he sends the cops. Congratulations, Grandpa, on your big victory–from whose jaws you are about to snatch defeat. Heh, heh, heh.
