Revolutionary opportunism, part duh–or, How to spin paja into gold

“Chávez is the people.” The writing is on the wall. And the Middle East is reading.

I said as much as this last week, but it’s nice to see it confirmed by Venezuelanalysis just the same:

As the wave of popular uprisings has spread across the Arab world, a flurry of articles have appeared suggesting Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez could be the next “dictator” to be overthrown.

Such arguments follow a pattern in the corporate media of slandering the Chavez government and the revolutionary process it leads.

They aim to conceal the real threat that haunts imperialism: that the Arab world may follow the example of Venezuela and other countries in Latin America — and break away from Western hegemony.

Bingo, ptingo. That’s exactly what those Arab countries are doing–even Libya, which is being wrongly bracketed with Venezuela as having a tyrant ripe for overthrow. Maybe Gaddafi is one, but Chávez? Not even hardly:

All up, pro-Chavez forces have won more than a dozen national elections, all verified as free and fair, since 1998.

With new elections set for 2012, Chavez maintains more than 50% support — even in polls commissioned by the US-funded opposition.

And by the way, those elections have all been verified as such by Jimmy Carter himself–hardly a commie or even a pinko, no matter what his detractors may say.

Why is it important that Chávez was elected? Detractors will no doubt sniffle the usual tired snot about Hitler being elected, too. But Hitler was only elected to one seat in the Reichstag; the chancellery of all Germany was the result of backroom wrangling and arm-twisting of a most antidemocratic nature. And the “freedom-loving” United States never uttered a peep about that!

And no wonder: Hitler did not represent a serious threat to capitalism. In fact, he was a happy collaborator in it after his own fashion, abolishing workers’ unions and all other manifestations of popular power in Germany. Guess who is the exact opposite of all that?

The reality is that as US hegemony is being challenged by the popular uprisings in the Arab world, right-wing commentators and policy-makers are scrambling to spin the situation to their own advantage.

They are singling out governments outside of US control as possible targets for enforced “regime change” from outside.

Responding to the idea that Venezuela could be next, Chavez noted on February 18 that what was occurring in Egypt “started here a while ago. We have been in rebellion for a while now, in a revolutionary rebellion.”

Chavez said that rebellion began in Venezuela with the February 1989 popular uprising known as the Caracazo.

As a result of International Monetary Fund-imposed hikes in fuel prices, tens of thousands of Venezuelans poured onto the streets of Caracas and other major cities to protest against the neoliberal measure.

A brutal crackdown left thousands dead, according to some estimates, and temporarily quelled the rebellion.

However, the fervour continued in Venezuelan society, leading to Chavez’s election in 1998 on an anti-neoliberal platform.

Chavez said: “What happened in Egypt — and which has not finished — is a sudden awakening of people’s power. We have only seen the first waves.

“They are events that mark a new phase of history in the entire world.”

And that’s just what the right and the so-called left in the US both fear. Egypt is learning from Venezuela’s example. So are the other rebel nations of the Middle East and northern Africa. Their sovereignty has Washington quaking in its well-polished shoes. Why, for all we know, those people might end up electing their own Chávez, or several! And then what?

No chance of the US covertly controlling the region anymore. That’s what.

This is why the White House and State Dept. have reacted to these bids for freedom in such muted tones. They’d have preferred the dictators, since the dictators kept the populaces docile and dependent, instead of rebellious, demanding and potentially sovereign as they are becoming now.

Of course, the timing could not be a neater coincidence–or more unfortunate for Washington and its dictator-enablers. In 1989, around this time, the Caracazo was raging in Venezuela. It began on February 27 and continued until March 4. Days of rage–utterly unplanned, spontaneous, arising in direct response to Carlos Andrés Pérez’s craven kowtowing to the IMF. What was CAP, if not a tame and only nominally elected dictator masquerading as a “great friend of democracy*”? He sent the troops out to fire on protesters in the street, just as Mubarak did with his hired mobs and camel-riding police, or Gaddafi with his hired mercenaries. He alienated his own country’s army, just as Mubarak and Gaddafi have done with theirs. More than a thousand people were killed in those five horrific days. Venezuela is still exhuming their corpses from mass graves and striving to identify those victims to this day.

Democracy did not come to Venezuela overnight or even easily after that. The Bolivarian military rebellions of 1992 failed, and their leaders–including Chávez–went to prison for it. Even when Chávez was released, there was still a lot of work to do: a new movement to organize, the support of various existing “third” parties to rally, an electoral platform, a campaign. It was nine hard-slog years between the days of rage and the election of Venezuela’s first real democratic leader.

And Washington fought it tooth and nail all the way.

And as you can see by all the silly anticommunist “pro-freedom” crapaganda (such as this craptastic opinion piece, which completely ignores the Caracazo–also an event of 1989, that not-so “great year for freedom”) floating through their media, they’re still at it. They have never been able to accept Chávez as a legitimate leader. They could save all that USAID money they’re throwing at Venezuela and Cuba and put it toward free universal healthcare, as Venezuela and Cuba do. But noooo, that would undermine “freedom”, which isn’t supposed to be free. You’re supposed to buy it, after all. Not work for it; not even fight for it; BUY it and keep buying it, no matter how many times you get ripped off when the shit breaks down. That’s the capitalist way.

But who will buy, if there are no clients left?

That’s the real reason they’re claiming that Chávez is a dictator and ripe for toppling. He isn’t, and he isn’t. And the reason he isn’t? He dared to say no to Washington. Go figure, the people actually love him for it. And small wonder: He’s only acting on their wishes! Washington lost THEIR hearts and minds long ago–not only in 1989, but well before that.

And at the rate it’s going, it will never get them back.

*”Democracy”, in this case, to be understood as a euphemism for what Chavecito calls by its right name: savage capitalism.

Music for a Sunday: I’ll say you let me be your friend

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Wankers of the Week: Cheesed off in Wisconsin

Whooooo-ee! Look like there’s not so much distance between the Middle East and the Midwest after all. Even in the teeth of a narrrrrsty La Niña winter, Wisconsinites are getting their Days of Rage on. Egyptians are in solidarity, which is seriously cool. And even cooler, the local cops are joining in rather than busting heads, and asking serious questions as to why they’re supposed to plant provocs in the crowd (and are, to their credit, doing nothing of the sort). Toronto, are you paying attention? This is what should have happened during the G20 summit last year. Madison is eating your lunch. And here’s who else is not getting any cheese on their sammy this week:

1. The Phucking Phelps KKKlan. Seems they tried to put one over on “Anonymous”, the league of extraordinary gentlemen (and -women?) who’ve been dealing some much-needed whup-ass to those who’ve needed it most, mainly over Wikileaks. Unfortunately, this Phelpsian Phishing Trip was an Epic Phelpsian Phail.

2. The Fucking Texas Legislature, again. Yeah, guns on campus–GREAT idea! Maybe they’ll want to bring back that quaint old college custom of young bucks dueling over girls, too. Shoot, what’s one more massacre in a country already swimming in gore? BTW, Guvnor Goodhair looks like a total fucking dork waving his pistol in the air–not that he isn’t one anyway.

3. Tomas Fucking Bautista. It’s not a question of how drunk you have to be–it’s a question of how small your dick has to be for you to even consider sexually assaulting a Chihuahua doggie.

4. Rush Fucking Limbaugh. Michelle Obama’s weight is healthy and appropriate for a woman of her height and bone structure. The Pigman’s is not. She is active and can eat whatever she damn well pleases. He is sedentary, and really needs to shut his racist piehole. PS: Make that his LYING racist piehole. Her rib-fest, it turns out, was calorically sensible, which I doubt would be the case with the Pigman.

5. Scott Fucking Walker. This teabag is looking more and more like that SOB who said “We had to destroy the village [of My Lai] in order to save it”. The question I’m sure is topmost in everyone’s mind is, what the hell is he “saving” by wrecking Wisconsin with his manufactured budget crisis? Oh, and then there’s the little matter of his job-killing climate-change denial, too. They ought to give out awards for this kind of prize idiocy.

I don’t know how GPAs relate to real percentages or letter scores (GPAs aren’t used in Canada for the most part, and the method of calculating them seems ridiculously convoluted to me), but I have it on good authority that a 2.3 score is underwhelming. Proof, in case you need it, that the US school system is in trouble, and that defunding education is the worst thing you can do to it. But if you’re a teabag, no doubt you WANT to see everyone else dragged down to your own level, if not even lower.

PS: Oh, Teh Stoopid. It BURNS! Let’s hope it burns his sorry ass straight out of office.

6. Bobby Fucking Franklin. Yes, miscarriage IS manslaughter to some of these anti-choicers. And this one wants to prosecute it as such. Unbefuckinglievable. Next up, I suppose, he’ll want to hire a force of sex-police with bloodhounds, to sniff the nether regions of all the women for signs of unauthorized sexual activity.

7. Silvio Fucking Berlusconi. A friend of Gaddafi? Oh, FUCK. Well, I guess in a weird way, it makes sense; after all, didn’t ol’ Moammar provide him with cover when his hooker was in trouble with the law? And oh yeah: No same-sex marriage while he’s dictator of Italy, either. Because we wouldn’t want them faggots and lezzies to get the crazy notion that they’re equal human beings, would we now?

8. Mark Fucking Myrie, alias Buju Fucking Banton. Hope you enjoy your Grammy statuette in prison, you homophobic drug-thug. Don’t drop the soap!

9. Sarah Fucking Palin, alias Lou Fucking Sarah. “Amen”-ing and praising yourself through a sockpuppet on Facebook? You know you’re NOT popular when.

10. Michelle Fucking Malkin. Why?

That’s why. She’s arguing with a FAKE Rahm Emmanuel. And she’s too “f’n” cowardly to write fuck and shit, too. Are there letters missing on your cute widdle typewriter, Michelle, or are you just afraid to break a nail on the nasty-wasty cusswords?

11. Jeff Fucking Cox. The anti-labor shit has hit the fan in Indiana, too…and for saying “use live ammo”, this former deputy state attorney general might just deserve to get a taste of his own hotheaded medicine. It’s part of a larger pattern of reckless and genocidal (and racist) rhetoric, so he can’t very well claim it was just the heat of the moment. Do Hoosiers really want such unstable people occupying their public offices?

12. Abby Fucking Johnson. Bad enough that she saw the dark and crossed over to that side, but now this former Planned Parenthood-er is joining forces with Lie-là Rose? Jesus doesn’t like dishonest people, you two.

13. Kanye Fucking West. Why?

That’s why. Next time, think up a non-misogynist way to tell your “ballin’ niggas” to use condoms. Oh, and BTW, abortions do NOT cost $50,000-$100,000, either. And if you fear you’re going to be extorted by your sex partners, maybe the best thing to do is just keep it in your pants.

14. Peter Fucking Worthington. A bit late to the anvil chorus of Lara Logan finger-waggers, are we? Well, don’t worry…unWorthy has more than made up for it with a castor-oil dose of good, old-fashioned paternalistic sexism. He even praises her for being so plucky and supporting embedded bootlicking (a blot on journalistic independence for which I recall wank-listing her at the time, and deservedly so–reporters in the field, even war correspondents, don’t owe their sources a flattering account, they owe the homefolks an honest one). He’s all gushy about her guts, is old Peter. But really, you can just tell he wants to pat her on her pretty blond head and tell her to go back home and cower in the kitchen. Women with children don’t belong in a war zone, sez our “protective” old chauvinist. There are two things wrong with that contention: (1) What about women and children in the line of fire–local civilians in a war zone? Collateral Damage, in other words; and (2) Tahrir Square wasn’t a war zone, it was the scene of a largely peaceful protest against a tyrannical régime, and for the most part, it was exceptionally safe for women during that time. There’s a third thing wrong with it, as well: Nobody ever criticizes a male war correspondent for abandoning his family! Won’t somebody think of the children?

15. William Fucking Hague. Thanks, Willy, thanks a real fucking buttload for singlehandedly reviving that tired old bogus meme, the one that goes “Hugo Chávez is a dictator because he supports Gaddafi”. It’s bullshit on every count, as you’d know if you troubled to read even a little bit of real news from Venezuela. Chávez doesn’t support Gaddafi, he supports LIBYA (and all other Arab and African countries facing imperial menaces, come to that). His “support” for Gaddafi is mainly praise for the Libyan revolution, and for the fact that it’s not a puppet state–PERIOD. As for his supposed “authoritarianism” at home, chow down on this: Dictators don’t urge parliamentary debates, increase voter interest, and foster public participation in politics, or strike compromises with their opponents. Chavecito does all that and more. Don’t you feel like a fucking idiot now? You should, because you ARE.

Notice who’s standing next to Gaddafi? Gee, they look kinda British…

16. Pamela Fucking Geller. Ever hear of Rule 34? Well, she’s Rule 35: If it exists, she will make islamophobic hate porn out of it. I’ve wank-listed her several times now, and it’s gratifying to see that the Southern Poverty Law Centre has finally seen fit to do the same. Her response was another predictable wank. Hey Pammy, hatemongering makes you fugly, and it’s nothing a good plastic surgeon can fix, either.

17. Fucking Dubya. Whatsamatter, Georgie…afraid to share a stage with Julian Assange? I guess you should be. After all, who knows what goods he’s got on you and all your corporate cronies?

18. Charlie Fucking Sheen. Biting the hand that feeds your monkey? Yeah, that was a really smart move. Sorry, Charlie, but spouting motivational gubbish at full volume and speed doesn’t make you sound like you’ve been cured. It sounds like the next act is gonna be you, running naked down the street, screaming that the coke bugs are underneath your skin, sucking your precious bodily fluids. Kiss your career goodbye; it was almost funny while it lasted.

19. Donald Fucking Rumsfeld. Somehow, it doesn’t surprise me to hear that Rummy IS a lizard person. Or at least, that he won’t deny it.

20. Dimitri Fucking Soudas. Why?

That’s why. Yes, he really went there. And so did his boss’s empty plane. All the way from Amman to Tripoli and back.

21. Scott Fucking Hagerstrom. Why DO they call themselves Americans for Prosperity? It’s not prosperity they’re for, it’s the prosperous who got that way at the expense of everyone else’s right to prosper. BTW, isn’t “taking them out at the knees” a MAFIA tactic?

22. Robert Fucking Dewar. Hasn’t Canada been here before? And how many times does it have to be said before all these old white male judges understand a few simple facts? How a woman is dressed is not an invitation to sex. Wanting to dance is not an invitation to sex. Having too much to drink is not an invitation to sex. Watering the shrubbery is not an invitation to sex. Even skinny-dipping is not an invitation to sex. Only an invitation to sex is an invitation to sex!

23. Chris Fucking Lee, again. Not only was he trolling for extracurricular women on Craigslist, but now a couple of transgendered women are coming out and saying he trolled THEM, too–using ads specifically aimed at their gender. His motives for doing so are still known only to himself, but I’d say this was probably the real reason he resigned. There is no plausible deniability, even something as lame as a wide stance or luggage lifting, when it comes to transwomen.

24. Newt Fucking Gingrich. A serial adulterer really has no business to suggest impeachment over a president’s failure to uphold an anti-gay “defense of marriage act”. Especially not since he was boinking the bejeezus out of his much younger mistress (who became wife number three) while howling for the impeachment of Bill Clinton, whom he and his colleagues browbeat into signing said stupid-ass act in the first place.

25. Seif al-Islam Fucking Gaddafi. Yes, that’s right, the Libyan dictator’s son thinks the killing of protesters is just a big joke. Let’s see how funny he finds it when his head starts to roll. I bet it will be at least as funny as his wack-ass dad’s hallucinogenic instant coffee rant.

26. The Fucking Tolkien Estate. “Copyright infringement” THIS, you greedy fucks. It’s not as if anyone had actually rewritten Lord of the Rings, is it? How tedious it would be if it were!

And finally, to all the idiots out there in Internetlandia who are comparing Venezuela to Libya, and hoping that Chavecito’s gonna fall like Gaddafi. Not a snowball’s chance, since there’s no comparison between the two. Chavecito is peaceful, he’s popular, he’s democratically elected, he’s sane, and nothing he ever said about Gaddafi is gonna change that. Why not compare the Libyan tyrant to that fascist fucker Berluscoglioni, instead? Your chance of accuracy would be that much greater, since those two are actually pals. But nooooo, that would be too obvious and not convenient enough, eh?

Good night, and get fucked!

Festive Left Friday Blogging: The only astroturfing Evo ever needs to do

I woke up this morning with Evo on the brain. (Get your mind out of the gutter, people, it wasn’t like THAT.) It occurred to me that it had been a while since I’d posted some pix of him doing something nice for other folks down there in Bolivia. So I scoped around to see what he’s been up to lately, and sure enough I found something:

Evo opening a new soccer field for the mining town of Colquiri, near La Paz.

As you can see, he’s dressed to play, and once the ribbon-cutting was all over and done with, that’s just what he did:

The grass is artificial, so the locals won’t have to squander any precious resources maintaining it. That’s important in a place like Bolivia, where shrinking mountain glaciers mean dwindling water supplies.

And that is the only time you’ll ever see Evo astroturfing–in any sense of the word!

Quotable: Julian Assange on Mark Zuckerberg

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When the oppos do it, it’s a “protest”…

…and when Chavistas do it, it’s just a “stunt”.

SUPPORTERS of Venezuelan president Hugo Chavez waved raw meat at hunger strikers yesterday, in mockery of a protest against alleged human rights abuses.

More than 50 students have been on hunger strike to highlight cases of jailed Chavez opponents. A small group of his backers tried to set up a barbecue outside a Caracas building where a dozen hunger strikers have been camped for three weeks.

Gee, do you think the anglo whore media is a wee bit biased up there in Scotland? I know the Dissociated Press sure is:

A congressman-elect said Wednesday he has been released from house arrest, apparently because of a three-week hunger strike by students who demanded that opponents of President Hugo Chavez be freed.

Biagio Pilieri was elected to Venezuela’s congress in September, but has been unable to take his seat due to charges he was involved in corruption during his 2000-2004 tenure as mayor of the western city of Bruzual. Pilieri told the Globovision television channel that he was eager to enter the National Assembly.

It is not clear if he is now able to serve. Pilieri’s attorney, Norma Delgado, told Union Radio he was granted “conditional liberty,” meaning the charges against him remain active.

Felix Herrera, another lawyer on Pilieri’s defense team, told Globovision the former mayor was prohibited from leaving the country and must appear in court every 30 days.

Pilieri denied any wrongdoing: “We’ve shown that we are innocent.”

Pilieri’s release came a day after dozens of student activists ended a hunger strike that began on Jan. 31 to demand the release of more than two dozen Chavez foes they consider political prisoners.

Julio Cesar Rivas, who helped organize the hunger strike, called the judge’s decision to release Pilieri “an important signal.”

“We are very happy,” Rivas said in an e-mail sent to The Associated Press.

Notice their sourcing? Globovisión and Union Radio–two rabidly anti-Chávez channels. Nope, no bias there. Also, nothing from VTV or any other unstinky sources.

As for Pa’Julio, maybe they’d like to take a closer look at him, too…he’s not the innocent boy he makes himself out to be. The oppos recently had a little tweet-a-thon that went nowhere. Maybe because their thuggish “student leaders” aren’t really serious people:

“Hi, I’m Julio César Rivas and this is my photo against the DICTATORSHIP.”

And if you really wanna know how whorish they are at the AP’s LatAm desk, look what they buried at the very bottom of that piece. A kernel of reality, just a wee small one:

Chavez vehemently denies his government has used judges and prosecutors to target adversaries.

Justice Minister Tareck El Aissami, who had meet with hungers strikers to discuss their demands, said Wednesday that “democracy triumphed” after the students ended their protest.

El Aissami did not comment on Pilieri’s case, but he told Union Radio that it is impossible to release all prominent Chavez opponents who have been jailed because some have been sentenced on serious charges such as murder.

That’s just three paragraphs. Compare that to the eleven that the oppos got, in which nothing they say was questioned. Whereas there’s plenty of room for doubting Chavecito’s and Tareck’s words in the excerpt above, wouldn’t you say?

And get that very last bit: “…some have been sentenced on serious charges such as murder.” Now, why do you suppose they buried THAT at the bottom? Could it be that they just don’t want to admit that the Venezuelan oppos have a real fascist death fetish going on there?

Nawwww…couldn’t be!

When all else fails, wank and the Dissociated Press will republish it. Without criticism. Because they’re just so fair and unbiased that way.

LuCIA got some ‘splainin’ to do…

Oh LuCIA…Pakistan would like to know why you sent an agent on a murderous rampage in the streets of Lahore:

The American who shot dead two men in Lahore, triggering a diplomatic crisis between Pakistan and the US, is a CIA agent who was on assignment at the time.

Raymond Davis has been the subject of widespread speculation since he opened fire with a semi-automatic Glock pistol on the two men who had pulled up in front of his car at a red light on 25 January.

Pakistani authorities charged him with murder, but the Obama administration has insisted he is an “administrative and technical official” attached to its Lahore consulate and has diplomatic immunity.

Based on interviews in the US and Pakistan, the Guardian can confirm that the 36-year-old former special forces soldier is employed by the CIA. “It’s beyond a shadow of a doubt,” said a senior Pakistani intelligence official. The revelation may complicate American efforts to free Davis, who insists he was acting in self-defence against a pair of suspected robbers, who were both carrying guns.

Pakistani prosecutors accuse the spy of excessive force, saying he fired 10 shots and got out of his car to shoot one man twice in the back as he fled. The man’s body was found 30 feet from his motorbike.

“It went way beyond what we define as self-defence. It was not commensurate with the threat,” a senior police official involved in the case told the Guardian.

The Pakistani government is aware of Davis’s CIA status yet has kept quiet in the face of immense American pressure to free him under the Vienna convention. Last week President Barack Obama described Davis as “our diplomat” and dispatched his chief diplomatic troubleshooter, Senator John Kerry, to Islamabad. Kerry returned home empty-handed.

Many Pakistanis are outraged at the idea of an armed American rampaging through their second-largest city. Analysts have warned of Egyptian-style protests if Davis is released. The government, fearful of a backlash, says it needs until 14 March to decide whether Davis enjoys immunity.

Given that his cover is now blown, I doubt whether immunity would help him very much. It’s kind of hard to claim diplomatic status when you’re actually Special Forces, and harder still when you’ve shot dead two men in cold blood on the streets of a major city. And hardest of all when the Pakistani ISI’s own agents say “beyond a shadow of a doubt” that you’re a spook.

And how do you like that euphemism: “administrative and technical official”. Uh, you mean HITMAN, don’t you? I doubt very much that this dude’s job was rubber-stamping passports and visas. I doubt that was even his diplomatic cover.

But kudos to the Yanks for trying. It’s not the first time they’ve had to attempt “diplomatic” cover for their asses, either. Remember this little incident in Bolivia?

Oh LuCIA, you crazy redhead you…

PS: It gets crazier. He’s not a diplomat at all, he’s a Blackwater merc. Since when do THEY have diplomatic immunity/cover? Unless the entire corporation is a CIA front, the answer is since NEVER.

Revolutionary opportunism, or Better Living Through Ignorance!

A Tunisian mural depicts Latin American revolutionary hero Che Guevara, who is widely admired in the Arab/Muslim world. This is what some people would like you NOT to see, much less connect with current events.

Ever since the shit hit the fan in Tunisia and Egypt, there have been idiots on the Internet trying to use the Arab revolutions to tell Cuba (and Venezuela) that “this is how it’s done”. Look, they say, pointing to the falling dictators of northern Africa–you can do that with yours, too! Go on, what are you waiting for? Embrace freedom! You have nothing to lose but your…

Oh, stop.

The problem with all this faux-Marxian throw-off-your-chains rhetoric, especially if it comes from the US, should be obvious. It just plain stinks coming from anyone stuck in the hypocritical duopoly of US politics, where presidents of both parties have hardly been what anyone would call friends of democracy in the Arab/Muslim world. For decades, virtually all Arab dictators* (including monarchs) have been propped up by USAID financing, CIA training and the like. Their tanks, their fighter jets, their guns, even their bullets, were all sold, sealed and delivered with love and kisses from Washington.

In other words, the chains being thrown off in Tunisia, Egypt, Bahrain and elsewhere are Made in the USA.

Meanwhile, the “dictators” of Venezuela and Cuba are strictly home-grown. They arrived in office by way of popular revolts against a tame dictator (in Cuba) and a slew of tame, weak, phony “democrats” (in Venezuela). One waged a successful guerrilla war, the other a failed military uprising. They ARE revolutionaries already.

And, in the case of Hugo Chávez, the “dictator” is not even a dictator, but democratically and popularly elected (and re-elected, with the constitution amended by popular demand to allow him to stay on as long as the people of Venezuela want him). Six out of ten Venezuelans voted for him, and an even greater number currently approve of his reign. You’d think, with such a broad popular mandate, he’d be an acknowledged democratic hero. And he is–but not in the United States of Amnesia.

As for the Brothers Castro, Fidel is now retired, Raúl probably will do so eventually himself, and believe it or not, Cuba does have elections–and even non-communist political parties! So it’s not exactly the closed one-party state of Castro-communism you may have been led to believe it was. The Brothers Castro enjoy genuine and widespread respect among their own people; the first large estate they nationalized under land reforms was their own. If they had wanted to rule the island with an iron fist, they could have done so easily enough as old-school oligarchs. If the people of Cuba wanted them gone, they could have toppled them at any time, and in the same way as the Castros did it with Batista. In fact, they could have done so with surprising ease during the Special Period, when Cuba lost its main trading partner, the Soviet Union, and handfuls of balseros started fleeing for Miami (and often, drowning like Elián González’s mother) on makeshift rafts. The counterrevolution could have happened long ago in Cuba, but it didn’t. Why? It’s not as if they lacked the revolutionary guerrilla experience! Why, oh why, did the Cuban people remain overwhelmingly loyal even in the darkest times, instead of turning against their long-established leaders?

Things like this, I’m sure, have the wonks in Washington endlessly scratching their hoary heads.

While the Arab countries have only just now begun to demonstrate that they are tired of tame dictators (or what Washington calls “great friends of liberty” and crap like that), the Latin Americans have done the same for decades in many countries already. And continue to do so by NOT falling for the “embrace your USAID-financed freedom!” hype. Venezuelans are hyper-vigilant against the CIA black propaganda that led to the success of OTPOR in Serbia, and they’re not fooled by OTPOR wannabes like the violent, fascist “youth” group JAVU. Meanwhile, Cubans just roll their eyes at the narrow, self-centred demonstrations of mercenaries such as the Ladies in White, and the easily debunked blogorrhea of “award-winningYoani Sánchez, who has the kind of internet service that probably even the Brothers Castro can only dream of.

Why aren’t they fooled? Well, when you’ve been dealing with this kind of thing since the Bay of Pigs invasion, if not much earlier, you already know what rank bullshit (Made in USA!) smells like.

You also know that a real grassroots Cuban blogger doesn’t have her own dedicated server, let alone get her work translated into dozens of foreign languages by hand, not Babelfish.

And you just know that if it were really so oppressive in Venezuela and Cuba, if there really were the kinds of censorship the Miami-based opponents of the “rrrrrégimenes” claim there is, you wouldn’t even be able to read about it on the tweeter. If Hosni Mubarak could succeed in shutting down the Internet in Egypt for even 24 hours, do you think his supposed Latin American counterparts would hesitate to do the same?

And yet, they haven’t. And life goes on as usual in both countries. No mass uprisings. No major demonstrations. Except in support of their leaders, which is something you won’t see the anglo whore media publicizing anytime soon.

Oh yeah, and before I forget to mention this: It was Twitter that recently censored Cuba, not the other way around. So much for the notion that corporate capitalism supports freedom of expression, eh?

Oh, and then there’s the salient and interesting fact that Chavecito is on the tweeter himself, and has urged his supporters to sign on, too. Venezuela is now one of the most Twitter-pated countries in Latin America, with Chavista tweeters well represented. In fact, ALL the internets are vibrant and buzzing in Venezuela, regardless of political affiliations.

And have I mentioned yet that Chavecito is also very popular in the Arab world, precisely because he is a democrat who stands up to Washington? I seem to recall having done so before. But just in case I haven’t, here’s a link. It’s still as fresh and relevant today as it was five years ago.

You can see that Venezuela and Cuba have nothing to “embrace” that Washington and Miami have to offer. Radio Martí may still be wasting the US taxpayers’ dollars (which could have gone toward a nice, Cuban-style universal public healthcare system, say), but no one’s listening. Radio Rebelde (Che’s original channel!) is the truly popular station on the dial. And Radio Bemba–good old-fashioned Latin American word of mouth–saved the day when Chavecito was briefly ousted by a bunch of fascist putschists who had ample military backing from Washington. Even when the putschists shut down all the public, alternative and community media (including pirate radio stations), the word still got out that the elected Chavecito–friend of Fidel and Cuba–was missing and in danger of being killed. Word of mouth literally saved him–millions of ordinary Venezuelans mobilized, much as millions of ordinary people in North Africa are doing now.

So, all you idiots out there in Internet-land, stop making stupid noises about how Venezuela is “the next domino”, or that Cuba should take a lesson from the Arabs. The truth is, the Arabs have been taking lessons and inspiration from both those countries for years, and it’s clear that they have learned those lessons well. That’s why Washington is in such a panic right now, unable to truly embrace the Arab revolutions itself.

Meanwhile, Chavecito and Fidel are doing just that. And they’re doing it in the face of sustained attacks on their respective revolutions. Those revolutions succeeded for a reason, and it wasn’t US backing. It was and still is the popular backing of their own people.

If I were one of those noisy numbskulls, I’d be feeling pretty foolish right now.

*The obvious exception is Libya. Libya has oil, and has long been targeted by the US, unsuccessfully, for takeover. Don’t anyone believe they would install a “better” dictator than you-know-who, though…they don’t really care how brutal he is, as long as he’s tame.

Aim High

Nothing can stop the US Air Force…

…except maybe a wall. A firewall, to be exact. A firewall made of forewarned, forearmed humans.

And yes, this is your forewarning, dear humans. They are seeking professional internet trolls, sockpuppets, and even the software with which to do it (they hope) undetected.

It’s hardly surprising that they would resort to disinformation over the Internet; one expects the worst of the world’s biggest military-industrial complex, especially when it’s losing the hearts and minds of the world. What’s amusing is that they’re actually advertising for it, not suspecting that they’re being watched by some very jaundiced eyes. And some internet-savvy ones, at that.

(And just in case that ad disappears, I have a screengrab saved. Clicky here to see it in full.)

Music for a Sunday: I’ll have what he’s having!

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